This was my response (tough but so needed) to Elle Magazine in regards to this article they posted in this month's issue:
http://www.elle.com/Life-Love/Sex-Relationships/They-Like-It-Like-That-Why-Every-Woman-is-Desirable
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When I subscribed for Elle, I anticipated articles and issues revolving around subjects catered to raising my self-esteem and pride in being a mature, bright, young and well, beautiful (in my terms) female. I never expected to feel the opposite; to start generating this disgust at the fate I was born into. To find that with each issue, my sex was losing more and more of its dignity and worth.
I'm not necessarily talking about the trends and fashion ads in specific, because, let's face it, many of us women do enjoy seeing what's new and what will work with our very own styles; especially those of us who enjoy and prefer a modest fashion. We look for any opportunity of finding a potentially successful outfit. Even my mother, the woman least interested in the "IT" world of Prada and Gucci, desires a sneak peak into fine fashion. But after strumming through a few pages of this months issue (August 2010), we were both ready to dump it right into the recycle bin rather than save it. So what was it this time that really pushed us over the top?
Other than the six plus pictures of visible or nearly visible breasts (which exceeded normalcy and vulgarity; just curious how can increased nakedness still be called fashion when sooner than later they'll be wearing NOTHING at all? What will those designers do with all their materials?), it was this month's Elle Reader Men article. As I hesitantly turned each page of the magazine, fearful of what naked and exposed body part would pop out at me on the next glossy page, I stumbled upon the article I was somewhat anxious to read thanks to the misleading commercialization of it on the front cover. The exact words read: Why All Men Really Want You Now. Seven words to truly intrigue any single girl into reading. Sort of like a sugar coated Uncle Sam Poster seducing men to WANT to join the army; women were seduced into opening up this issue and diving into what turned out to be a complete scam.
I stared at the picture attached to the article. An attractive blonde woman in the middle, with her head back laughing, wearing a short teal low cut dress revealing major cleavage; surrounded by three men (who looked much younger than her); one was staring somewhere close to her chest; one was staring at the table before him; and the third had his eyes far far away from her with a malicious smile across his face, clearly displaying the acts of a man who was already undressing girl number six with his eyes. The caption right above the picture pretty much summed up the scam for me right then and there: You know that look you catch your boyfriend giving other women?... That's when I realized that this wasn't an article aimed at helping women understand what valuable qualities in her attract a man, but rather it was just another disgusting article written (by a man) desperately trying to justify the pig-like status of his kind. Making us believe that it is their innate nature to be bastards and we, women, just have to accept it with our heads hung back and shirts and skirts completely open and ready.
I realized I couldn't rebut it or respond or even comment about it without reading it completely to the end, and so I did. I dove into the most disgusting ocean I ever found and endured the torturous crap this man kept throwing out there, as if he did some really fascinating research on how horny and perverted he and his kind were. And where did he just put the cherry on top and make me laugh and tip my hat to the idiocity? When he proudly stated a question to supposedly sum up the reason why men are so sexually obsessed, a question he thought made such a strong vibrant point, that he was clearly oblivious to the fact that it actually made him and his kind, look just like that--a kind--a species so distant from humanity. As he described his experiment of tallying the number "of appropriate age [women]--roughly 18 to 60--who walked" right past him in four minutes, and tallying the ones he found to be inappropriate, his female friend asked him why sex with strange or unknown women was such a turn on for men, and all he could conjure up was, "Do you go to the zoo and ask the tigers why they like meat?" I literally dropped the magazine at that point and blurted out, "What an idiot!" before gathering up the strength to go back and finish this sham of an article.
Yes, I'm sure it's fascinating entertainment for readers, even for a sociologist like myself, but to have to endure the fact that this man was trying to convince me that THIS IS THE WAY men are, and that we have to ACCEPT it as women was just unbelievable. And the fact that all four of the men he was describing were married and could've been considered "good" on paper, was even more deceitful. I wonder, if this man was a real man, why couldn't he or any of his buddies straight up reveal their identities to their wives and allow those poor women to understand what kind of mental Ivy League/Jock(straps)/sexual addicts they are living with--because the excuse of "we don't want our wives to know that we spend our days doing little else besides fantasizing about cheating on them" just does not cut it! I mean just reading how often these supposed men think of sex is quite disturbing. What happened to real men who could actually conduct themselves in society as proper humane people without having their brain jammed somewhere in their genitals? I guess that died with chivalry and romance long ago.
I think it's just sad that society has transformed into something so beyond liberal and virtue-less, allowing a man to openly state that the vision of a random lady in a tank top gives him something near an orgasm when he is happily married with kids. It just makes me want to keep up with the modesty of long sleeves and pants, even in the summer heat. I have dignity and I believe that women (and men) need to start strapping that on. And just because (as he stated) women don't walk around eying and mentally sexing every man that crosses their path doesn't mean they don't have a sexual appetite, but there's a sense of composure and modesty that comes along, and men need to learn that it's a part of being a man as well.
By the time I reached the end of these two and a half pages, I wondered how many women ACTUALLY benefited from it. After all, was that not the lie plastered on the front cover? An allure to why men want US NOW? We never expected to discover it was actually just because we ranged between the ages of 18 and 60 and had a vagina and boobs. Yes, that's all we apparently need because even saggy breasts are considered "Fun, like flesh Slinkys!" to them. So was the purpose then to just mold women's minds into accepting the role of kicking back and relaxing as we sit across the men's silver platters and take on the status of premium choice USDA beef whether we are aged or not?
